花开百样

这一期的三联生活周刊，讲的是剑桥，满满一本子都是英国式的学院气息，很多我知道的不知道的剑桥人，不同年代，不同来处和去处，都曾在那个充满历史，自由和思想的地方停留过。捧着书，我坐在班车上浮想联翩。看到一首诗，很喜欢：
我不假装能理解自然
不过我和她相处愉快
我看我的书
她料理母鸡和风雨
我们都很有耐心

这位27岁的诗人死在异乡，埋葬在爱琴海一个小岛的橄榄树林中，他说过，
如果我死去，请为我想想此事——外国的田野上有一些角落，它永远属于英国
诗人叫布鲁克 英国人

上一次见他，已经是五年之前
那之后，搬了家，换了手机，躲进人群
10月，老妈来上海陪我生日，我搂着老妈的脖子，答应她一定好好生活
圣诞，独自喝下一瓶红酒，半夜把jing吵醒，让他来救我，他守在沙发旁边，看我哭闹了一夜
新年，和朋友通宵胡闹，然后跳上去杭州的火车，灵隐寺里，西湖边，我无处安放我的绝望
我把灵魂和魔鬼交换了两年，感谢他让我放手，做回自己
过去的事，我学着绝口不提

开心网上，见到他小心翼翼的留言
他说“对不起”，我说“没什么”
再见他，已经没有原来的心动，尽管心还是习惯性的隐隐作痛
原来他还是等到了她，他们兑现了四年的约定
她和那个带她去美国的男人离了婚
他瞒着母亲和她结了婚
原来2004年我的那些故事，还没开始就已经结束

他们最终还是分开了，像电视剧本一样
他说我在他最困难的时候陪在他身边
他也曾疯狂的在网上搜我
他说他出版的那本书截稿日期写的是我的生日
他说如果我们后来在一起应该会很好
...
可是，没有如果
多年以后
我依然庆幸上天给我逃跑的机会
感激他和她教会我如何珍惜
...
当日子完了，我站在你面前，你将看到我的疤痕
你会知道，我曾经受伤，也曾经痊愈

It has been a long time since I ever visited here. Yes, this is always the place to stay with myself and enjoy the privacy. I hope I can come here more frequently but on the other hand, there is a voice inside myself that the time I come here is the time I feel uneasy or uncomfortable. I need the outlet for the bad mood and calm down again. In that sense, I hope I don't come here too much.
I just experienced a lot this half year and I had no choice but to swallowed all the things that I like or dislike. But generally, I feel lucky. I appreciate the whole things. I came to this small town for a couple of months and almost at last to get use to it but it's the time to leave. In today's class, prof. Doyle gave us all kinds of thanks, to co-teach professor, to all the international students, to us, two exchange students. When she asked all the international students to stand up and give them big hands, that made me feel really warm in this cold morning. I saw a lot of Asian faces and most of them are quite quiet in the classes because of the language problem. But I do feel their feeling that they struggle harder than the native students to get eligible for the tough market. They are intelligent and definitly they will have brilliant future. I expressed my thanks to the whole class, I hope they do feel the emotion behind my words. I love Prof. Doyle who always treat us like a family. And the style she brings to the class that we share everything openly.
When I decided to come here half an hour before, I was supposed to grumble the bad conversation between lynn and me. But now I change my mind with the reminder of the above thankful pleasure. Although I always feel awful to talk with her, since she is such a fanatic argue animal on every tiny little thing and always has judgment before she start to talk. ( ooh... forgive my asperity, just once.) I have to learn how to deal with people from different types. I want to enjoy the essential of thanksgiving.

有人说既然来到这里，就尽情享受这里的一切。

游戏终于结束了，两个C组各自上演了绝地反击，我们的策略大致是一样的，提高产品性能，同时提价增大margin，很快扭亏为盈。其余几个组还在苦苦为市场份额打价格战时，我们已经悄悄地脱身，靠产品的差异化吸引愿意付premium的客户，正如教授所说，you can do anything else much better than cutting price.

上个星期忙着上课，居然忘了lg的生日，还兴师动众的问罪为什么不给我打电话，结果好尴尬。回家又是好话又是陪罪，好不容易灭了火，累呀！